Possible First-Person Reflections of Mary and Joseph

James and I were asked to speak in Church today. James was to speak in the first person as Joseph, and I was to speak in the first person as Mary. Here are our talks:

Mary

"My soul doth magnify the Lord, And my spirit hath rejoiced in God my Saviour. For he hath regarded the low estate of his handmaiden: for, behold, from henceforth all generations shall call me blessed. For he that is mighty hath done to me great things; and holy is his name" Luke 1:46-49

There are times in each life when we are blessed to see with more clarity. When the questions, the fears, and the concerns, are quieted by a sure and peaceful knowledge that all is right, and that all things are in God's hands, and will turn out according to His perfect knowledge and mercy, love and justice. When the angel appeared to me and announced that I, Mary, would be the mother of the Messiah, His Only Begotten Son in the Flesh, I was blessed with this clarity, with total peace and a quiet assurance. This peace and assurance has remained with me through all that has since transpired.

When I returned from my wonderful visit to my cousin Elisabeth's home, I knew not whether my beloved Joseph would still have me to be his wife. I saw the hurt and confusion in his eyes, and knew that I had to leave this in God's hands as well. I remembered what our father David had said, "The LORD is my rock, and my fortress, and my deliverer; The God of my rock; in him will I trust: he is my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my high tower, and my refuge, my saviour;..." 2 Samuel 22:2-3

As in all things, when I have trusted in the Lord, things have turned out better than I could have hoped. Oh, the joy I felt to see the hurt and confusion in Joseph's face replaced by understanding and love and a confident determination. Joseph has been my Earthly angel ever since. He is such a kind and good man. He has been so good to me, and has such great faith. He leads our family with a perfect blend of strength and gentleness, faith and practicality.

And now, on this night of all nights, Joseph has seen to it that I was afforded as much privacy as this over-flowing city could provide. He has made sure that things are as clean and comfortable as our present circumstances will permit. And when he placed in my arms, my Son, the Son of God, our Savior, I was overcome with such joy and peace as I have never before known. I know that our Deliverer has arrived and that He will, indeed, redeem Israel.

Oh, my sweet baby! Do you remember? Do you know who you are? The whole world, for all generations of time, have looked forward to your time on the earth; and now here you are! As precious, as perfect, as wonderful as every hope held in the heart, as every prayer ever uttered! Thank you for letting me be your mother! You are worth every ounce of discomfort and every drop of blood I spilt in bringing you into this world. You are worth each questioning look and whispered word I endured. You are worth this straw poking in my back, and the miles between my family and here. You are my child, and yet, you are the Father's gift to the world. You are THE Bright and Morning Star! How blessed am I to be able to raise you; to be able to kiss you goodnight, and sing you lullabies; to help teach you to walk and to talk and to learn of your Father in Heaven. For, though I must share you with the world, there will be sweet, quiet moments that you and I will share. I will treasure these moments in my heart forever.

My sweet Son, I do not know why it is that you were to be born in a stable, with a manger for your bed. But I do know that I have felt a peace so sure, so enveloping, so tangible, that I am certain that things are unfolding as they should. I do not claim to understand all things, but I know that Heavenly Father lives, and that He is mindful of us -- especially You, his Only Begotten Son in the flesh. I know that He will guide us, and that He will keep you safe until you have fulfilled your mission here on the Earth. He has blessed You with two earthly parents who love you and who will take care of you to the best of their ability. He will protect us and provide for us.

I cannot wait to show you all the beautiful creations you have placed on Earth. Will you remember? Will I be teaching you, or will you be teaching me? Oh, what a unique privilege I have among all women in all the ages of time!

Dear Father in Heaven, please help me that I may be guided as I teach and care for our Son. Help me to understand my role, for though I am His mother, yet He is my King and my Savior. Please magnify my efforts, so that although I am human and prone to weakness and error, I may yet provide the nurture and guidance that He will need as He prepares to fulfill his mission here on the Earth. I thank Thee for the peace and blessings Thou has provided for us. Thank Thee for sending thy Son to the Earth at this time and in this way. In His name I pray, Amen.

***********
Joseph

When Mary came back from visiting her cousin Elisabeth, I was so excited to see her. She was after all espoused to me. How I missed her those months. She was always such beautiful young woman, and when she returned, I saw immediately that something had changed. Her form was just a bit different and I could tell she was now expecting a child. But how? Mary? . . . such a pure and always virtuous young woman. That is what I had always loved about her. And as I sought her to be my wife, I had prayed and felt confident that she was to be a lovely and righteous mother to my children. Somehow, I even felt that we might have a child that could change the world. But what of all that now? Had I been mistaken? I still loved her, but what was I to do? The betrothal agreement offers only 2 ways out according to our law. We could go to the elders and have a court, but oh how terribly damaging that would be to her… I didn’t want to hurt her. There was another way, we could have the espousal annulled with privacy, as the law allows. I was so troubled, then, it happened! After much prayer and anxiety I laid down to sleep, and suddenly I awoke with a start! I had had some amazing dreams before, felt definite answers to prayers, and undeniable spiritual impressions as I felt the Lord’s guidance, but this was beyond anything I had experienced! There stood a brilliant, shining being. I trembled with fear, but the angel before me said, “Joseph, thou son of David, fear not to take unto thee Mary thy wife: for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Ghost. And she shall bring forth a son, and thou shalt call his name Jesus: for he shall save his people from their sins.” Oh the wonder and surprise I now felt! So Mary had been true after all! I suddenly realized what the angel had meant. Of course I was familiar with the words of the prophet Isaiah:

Therefore the Lord himself shall give you a sign; Behold, a virgin shall conceive, and bear a son, and shall call his name Immanuel.
For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace. Of the increase of his government and peace there shall be no end, upon the throne of David, and upon his kingdom, to order it, and to establish it with judgment and with justice from henceforth even for ever.

All good Jews knew these prophecies. Especially during these difficult times when we suffered under the iron fist of Roman rule. Everywhere were to be found those who claimed to be a messiah, but now, to my Mary would be born THE Messiah. And I was to be his father… no, but a guide, a foster father. I was so amazed, the angel from Heaven knew my name, and as he said, “thou son of David,” I remembered what my father and grandfather had told me as a child. We were descendants of the great king David. In fact, had we not had so much turmoil, and the kingdom collapsed as we were conquered by foreign invaders, my grandfather would have been king, then my father, then I, and my first-born son as well. Yes, he too would have sat on the throne of David. And, the angel said that this child would indeed be this rightful king.

Of course, as quickly as we could, we got married. I then worked and applied all I knew to provide for this majestic child. I used every bit of spare wood I had to build a beautiful cradle. We prepared our home to welcome him into the world. We had very little, but we wanted to make a comfortable, warm, and clean place for him to live. I had but very little money, and if I could have afforded it, would have used the very best, most expensive woods imported from faraway lands for him. But even with what I had, I was able to create something beautiful, possibly my best work. Then, at the worst imaginable moment, just as Mary was nearly ready to deliver, the Tyrant from Rome decreed a law that would rob us of what little we had. Worse yet, we couldn’t just pay our taxes in our home city of Nazareth; we had to travel to my ancestral home, the City of David, Bethlehem. The whole country it seemed was on the move. Would no one be left in their homes? What a difficult journey it was. Mary, who by this time was uncomfortable even resting in our bed or in the best chair of the house, had to walk or ride my donkey more than 80 miles. If she had not been so uncomfortable, we might have made the trip in four days, but the going was slow, and it took nearly a week. We stopped along the way to sleep, and looked forward to finding an inn once we got to Bethlehem. But by the time we got there, hungry, uncomfortable, and tired, we went from inn to inn, but found no lodging. Maybe if I had been a noble, or had power, influence, or more money, we could have found someplace, but rooms were at a premium and there was no room for us in the inns. As we were searching, Mary’s discomfort increased. She was having contractions and I was getting desperate. Finally, an innkeeper took pity on us and allowed us to go behind the inn where the animals were kept in the stable. The smell was ripe. I borrowed a broom and was able to move away the filthy manure, but there was no keeping the flies away. Still, I marveled at her silent courage throughout the trip. Even now, she did not complain. I wondered, “Could there be a more unhealthy, a more disease-ridden, a more despicable circumstance in which a child could be born? Is this a place fit for a king? Should the mother of the Son of God be asked to enter the valley of the shadow of death in such a foul and unfamiliar place as this? Is it wrong to wish her some comfort? Is it right He should be born here?” I fought back tears as I tried to find clean straw and keep the animals back. How I longed to be back in Nazareth, where at least it would have been clean, and Mary would have had family, perhaps her sister, or mother, or even a close friend to help. But alas, only I was available, completely inexperienced as I was, to bring this holy child into the world. She wrapped him in strips of cloth she had brought, and I cleared the feeding trough the animals were eating from, and we lay him in this manger.

Despite the smell and the filth, I was completely overcome by the presence of this newborn son. I had always imagined that the birth of a child would bring great joy, but who could conceive of the magnitude of the spirit that filled my breast!?! It was as if Heaven itself had burst open and rejoiced at the sight of this lovely infant. Later that night, as a group of shepherds from the nearby hills came to worship him, they told of angels, singing in the heavens. I knew that this was indeed God’s son.

During the following years, back at our home in Nazareth, I was so blessed to work for countless hours with the boy Jesus in our shop, creating furniture from wood. We spoke and discussed the scriptures often. He had come, as all children do, with no knowledge, innocent and in need of nourishment and teaching. And so, in those days, I taught him the prophecies recorded by the prophets. We discussed the law and its meaning. And yet, it seemed so often, that he was teaching me. I would explain a passage of scripture, and he would clarify and show me other meanings I had not yet conceived! How quickly he learned, and progressed from grace to grace. I often lay awake at night wondering, “why me?” not in any self-pitying way, but in wonder and humility. Wouldn’t some great prophet have made a better tutor and guide to God’s son? Why was I chosen, a humble and poor carpenter, yes, with quite a genealogy, but that dated back 28 generations, centuries removed from me? Certainly I had studied in the synagogue when I could, but I was no prophet, rabbi, or scriptorian. I did feel guided by God’s light, but could I possibly be the kind of father God would want for his son? How I doubted, so often, my own abilities or worthiness. And, to my amazement, it seemed when I struggled the most, Jesus found ways to let me know I was doing just fine. No father could have been more blessed by a good and loving son.

I guess we don’t all need to be prophets. I suppose it’s always been the case that plain, unpretentious people have moved this majestic work forward. It seems that I served anonymously. In fact, later in His life, after Jesus had declared to the people openly his true divinity and messiahship, it was because of me, that many here in Nazareth were unable to believe. They thought he was my son, as I had tried to be his father. I always tried to live worthy of this boy and Lord.

If you are also serving anonymously, wondering if your service matters, or if you will be remembered, you are not alone, so too did one of the greatest men who ever lived, a man chosen to serve as earthly father and guide to Jesus through his boyhood and youth. And if Jesus were to speak to you personally, I am sure that he would speak to you as he so often did to Joseph and reassure you of his love and gratitude.

References:
Jeffrey R. Holland, “‘This Do in Remembrance of Me’,” Ensign, Nov 1995
Jeffrey R. Holland, “‘Maybe Christmas Doesn’t Come from a Store’,” Ensign, Dec 1977
Robert J. Matthews, “Mary and Joseph,” Ensign, Dec 1974
Jesus the Christ, p. 87
Isaiah 7:14, 9:6-7

Now That's True Empathy

Brianna has had a few unpleasant experiences with doctors and doctor's offices. The most recent being on the day when we were car shopping. Ben and Brianna were in the back seat when Brianna took a very tiny clasp from Ben's chain-type key-chain; this upset Ben who wanted it back; Brianna wanted to be sure that Ben couldn't get it back, so she shoved it up her nose -- WAY up her nose.

We headed to Daddy's office to try to remove it. It was Saturday, so we were the only people at the office. This meant that I had the next to impossible task of holding Brianna still so James could get a good look inside her nose. She was so upset, and would NOT hold still, so we had to strap her to a board, or a papoose, so that James could actually scope her nose, because, as I said before, she shoved it WAY up her nose.

Now, if you're Brianna, and moving is as vital to your existence as is breathing, being strapped to a board is more than just torture. It was truly the most pathetic thing I've witnessed with my children. She was SO upset, and yet, through her tears, and panic, she was very articulate. "Daddy, please don't hurt me any more!" "I don't like this!" "Please Doctor, please don't do this any more!" "Please don't hurt me Doctor!" It about broke James' and my heart -- especially that she dissociated James from the incident and stopped calling him Daddy, and called him Doctor instead. Thankfully, she lived through the incident, and, I think she learned a vital lesson -- the nose, while an effective hiding place, is NOT the best choice.

So, today, when I got a VERY painful splinter in the palm of my right hand, and couldn't get it out myself, I called James' office to see if anyone would be willing to dig it out for me. I knew James was stuck in surgery all day, but luckily, one of the very kind PA's was willing and available. So, I told the kids to get on their shoes so we could go. Brianna became very concerned when I told her where and why we were going. "Don't let them bruise you, Mommy!" She started crying and begging me to not go and to definitely not let them bruise me. I tried to reassure her that everything would be fine and that no one would bruise me. And then, I tried to reassure her that no one would hurt her at all either. She finally calmed a bit, but in the car, she again told me not to let them bruise me. I said, "No one is going to bruise me, I will be just fine." She said, "I better talk to the workers!"

On the way up the elevator, she gave me one last important bit of advice, "Don't lay down!" When we arrived, she marched right up to the "workers" and said, "Don't bruise my mommy!"

I had told her that she didn't even have to come in the room when they worked on my owie. I told her that she could stay in the hallway and read a book. So when they showed us to a room, she said, "May I read a book?" They took her out, and after I was all fixed up, she showed up with a huge handful of Dora stickers.

She got her stickers, I got my sliver removed (which was waaay too small to have caused such incredible pain!), and I am happy to report that so far, there are no bruises!

My sweet, precious, empathetic baby!

Mary, the Mother of Jesus

I have been asked to speak next week in the Christmas program in Sacrament meeting. The request was unusual in that I've been asked to speak in the first-person, as Mary.

Now, I have my own concerns with this approach, which I am not interested in discussing here. I do believe in doing my best to fulfill the assignments that I've been given. I must say that it has been a very interesting experience to ponder on Mary's role, and what she might have been thinking and feeling.

I wonder, how fully did she understand the Plan of Salvation? How fully did she understand what would be required of her Son? I know that all the prophet since Adam have prophesied about Jesus Christ, but how well was Mary taught in those prophecies? How much access did she have to those sacred records? Obviously she loved God the Father and Jesus Christ, and had incredible faith to do whatever was asked of her.

Were the people of Nazareth unkind to her and Joseph as it became obvious that she was "with child" from before the time that they were married?

I am interested to know if any of you have thoughts on Mary, her role, and what she may have been thinking and feeling. I would love to hear any of them.

Brianna's first words this morning ...

"Oh, the lights on our Christmas tree are so beautiful!! We better get the lights put up on our house really fast!"

So Blessed

I have just had the privilege of spending the last nine days with family -- my own, the family I grew up in, and the family I married into! It was wonderful! I can honestly say that I love and enjoy every one of them. I am very grateful for Eternal families because these are the people I want to spend eternity with.

My kids were so delightful and had SO MUCH FUN with all of their cousins! I think they may never quite recover from the sleep deprivation, but they will also treasure these memories.

Now it's time to deck the halls! I'm really tired from all the partying, but I also want to get the house all gussied up, and get the Christmas music filling the air! (James is very strict about no Christmas music until after Thanksgiving. Bah-humbug!)

Oh, the lemon car, you know the one that I tried to make into lemonade, well, let's just say that the dealership may have a lemonade stand up right now, trying to sell that to some other sucker! And we are now driving a beautiful Hyundai Veracruz which is very nice, and, incredibly, the check engine light has not come on once! For me, reliability is worth the higher price tag!

I hope that each and every one of you is having a wonderful holiday season; that the peace, the joy, and the healing that this season offers will be yours!

Lemonade

I took the car into the dealership and they cleared the code yesterday, and said that it was nothing to worry about. Today, after driving about another 10 miles, the check engine light came back on! And the car was shaking!
So, back I went to the dealership and went right up to the owner. He agreed to fix the car at his expense and he gave me a loaner car until it's done. Between the service tech and my dad (who is basically a car GENIUS -- not that his genius is limited to cars, ... but I digress) we think that they are actually maybe fixing what needs to be fixed, and we'll be good to go tomorrow! Hopefully this will take care of the problem and this car will work really well for us for a long time.
James pointed out to me that the timing of all of this is probably a huge blessing. If the check engine light had come on when we were test driving the car, we wouldn't have bought it, and would have ended up in a much more expensive vehicle. If it had happened in a week or two, we would be paying to fix this. All in all, if this is the sole problem, then we are very blessed in the timing!

There's just one more problem, I was working on using this experience as a teaching metaphor for my kids when they are old enough to date. You know, "sometimes cars and people are just plain gorgeous, and they seem to offer all that you could possibly desire, but if you can't depend on them, if they let you down when you need them most, then the cost of the relationship just isn't worth it."
Now, I have to change my teaching metaphor to something more along the lines of "none of us is perfect. We all make mistakes and unfortunately sometimes we let down even the people we love and care for the most. It's important to work through these situations and to support each other in becoming all that we can be." Or something like that.

Isn't it scary to get a peek into the workings of my strange brain??

Lemons Suck!

Last night, we spent four hours at a car dealership working to buy a used Chrysler Pacifica. In the end, we walked out with a NICE vehicle. This afternoon, as I drove to pick Ben up from school, the check engine light came on.

Seriously?! Less than 24 hours after signing the papers, and in less than 20 miles with me behind the wheel, and we've got engine trouble lurking?

Guess what else?! There are no "Lemon Laws" for our state! Nice.

I spoke with a manager on the phone, and he will speak with the owner in the morning to see if we can work something out. But, he made it clear that there were no guarantees, and the deal is done.

(Well, I did some research, and it seems that there are Lemon Laws, but just having the "check engine" light come on doesn't qualify.)

Soccer Pics

In the middle of one of Brianna's crying fits:

Ben says with a sigh, "Sometimes I wish Adam and Eve had never eaten that fruit."

Seasonal Sillies for the Younger Crowd

What is the one room in the house that ghosts avoid?
The living room!

Why don't cannibals eat missionaries?
Because you can't keep a good man down.

What does the rooster's ghost say each morning?
Cock-a-doodle-BOO!

Why don't bats live alone?
They like to hang around with their friends

What kind of music do mummies like?
"Wrap" music.

What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?
Frostbite

Why do vampires need mouthwash?
They have bat breath.

A Perfect Day, ... and Gorgeous!

Today was a perfect fall day! The sun was shining; the sky was blue; and the trees were in beautiful color! We were blessed to be able to spend the whole day together!!
After soccer games, family pictures, going out to eat, watching a movie, and riding bikes, I said to Brianna, "Brianna, you have just been delightful today!" She gave a modest little laugh and then said, "Ya, and gorgeous!"

Maybe we should all adopt this response to compliments we receive.

Possibly My Best Idea Ever

Yesterday I took control of a situation that has been really bothering me for quite some time. Getting my home clean and keeping it that way has been virtually impossible. I have two wonderful, bright, and VERY creative children. An important part of creativity and imagination, as I have learned, is to make the absolute biggest mess you can by getting out EVERY TOY, CRAYON, MARKER, SCRAP OF PAPER, AND BOOK in the whole house. It is usually best to do this at a VERY rapid pace if you happen to notice that mom is trying to clean.
The idea came to me a couple of days ago after I spent an entire HOUR after the kids were in bed just putting things away. I'm not talking about vacuuming, dusting, or wiping things down; no, simply picking things up, and putting them in their homes. Though I had the idea a few days ago, I had to work up the courage to carry it out, as I was unsure how the kids would take it.
I decided that we would have a Toy Library. Only a select few toys were left, and the rest went to the attic. Actually, that's a slight exaggeration, as I filled my car trunk with things for the Goodwill, but let's just keep that between you and me. I worked on this project for hours yesterday. The kids were home the whole time, but didn't even take notice. Then, when I was done, they started noticing things.
"Where are the toys, Mom?"
"All the toys are upstairs in the playroom."
"But, Mom, where are my army guys?"
"Well, they are in the attic in our new Toy Library."
"But, Mom, I want to play with them."
"Well, I left lots of toys for you to play with, if you don't like what I left, you can "return" them to the Library, and "check out" new toys."
How did it go, you ask? VERY WELL. Ben immediately jumped on board, gathering toys that he'd rather "return" and even coming up with three of his own donations for the Goodwill! Then, we took his "returns" up to the attic, and he "checked out" his army guys and some HotWheels.
I also let them know that any toys left out when they go to bed will be returned to the library. I had to pick up NO TOYS last night!! I even took a few minutes to read a book to myself in my orderly living room!
I hope it lasts, but I am encouraged that I met with absolutely no resistance from the kids.

Some more details and a status update

I recently wrote an e-mail to some friends, explaining what was going on with Ben. It gives a little more detail, and explains where we're at now, so I thought I'd put it here as my update.

Ben was actually doing fine in school, except that he wasn't being challenged. I had had a few things surface last year that made me wonder if that would be the right place for him to stay. Eventually, I had decided to just volunteer a lot, and get a more accurate and complete picture of the situation before I made up my mind.
At the back to school night, his principal's behavior and the way she treated the PTA president left me less than impressed. In fact, I felt that she would not advocate for her teachers, volunteers, or students. All she seemed worried about was how everything would make her look; and, to be honest, that attitude made her look stupid and juvenile.
Still, I wasn't thinking about moving Ben this year. But, I thought, it might be wise to switch schools next year. We had heard A LOT of good things about a charter school here in town. And, one of the things I had heard was that there was a waiting list. So, I called to get Ben on the waiting list for next year. When I did, they informed me that they had one Second Grade spot available now.
James and I discussed it, and we decided to at least get the paper work started while we made up our minds. James went to the temple and felt that it would be good to switch Ben. I went to the temple, and felt like my answer was to follow the counsel of my hubby.
So, we switched Ben. OH MY GOODNESS IT WAS ROUGH! Tears and emotional turmoil dominated our home for the first week and a half or so. I felt awful. Ben didn't ask for this change, and now he was miserable. It is a very demanding school. They switch classes like in Middle School, and that was very disconcerting to Ben.
We prayed about things again, of course, and counseled with our parents, and other parents of kids at the charter school, and with his home room teacher. In the end, we feel like we should try to stick it out. Thankfully, Ben has had a much better experience so far this week. I hope he continues to improve and learns to enjoy it. I certainly couldn't handle more of what we had at first.

An Update and stories

Thank you all so much for your concern and comments. It was helpful. We are still trying to figure out what is best for Ben. He had a better day yesterday, and today James and I are meeting with his teacher and an administrator to consult with one another about Ben.

I will try to give updates as we make decisions.

*******

On the Brianna front: she is just so dang cute! I can't look at her without thinking of how beautiful she is. She is beautiful on the inside too!

A few days ago, James and the kids were headed to the backyard to jump on the trampoline. Ben was already out there, and Brianna was trying to hurry James along. He finally said, "Hold your horses, Brianna." She very seriously, and with a slightly confused tone replied, "I not have horses." Then, James went in another room to get something, and Brianna headed outside. I overheard Ben ask her where Daddy was. She said, "Oh, he's wooking for some horses."

She is the most genuinely helpful 3 year old I've ever known. She is always trying to help me around the house, and sometimes she truly is quite helpful. She tends to think like a mom. When we visited my parents, she reminded her Grandfather to take his vitamins.
When Ben got stung by a hornet, she gently patted him, and said, "Oh, I'm so sorry, Bud. That reewy hurts." And a little later, when Ben was feeling better and playing, she walked up to him and asked, "How's the leg, Buddy? Feewing better?"

She pronounces "hospital" perfectly, even though Ben still says "hostable" (which I still think is adorable.) But some of her other words get really mixed up. I think it's darling, and sometimes I have a hard time modeling the correct pronunciation, because I like hers so well. For guitar, she says "target"; for mosquito bite, she says "skoodee bite"; for umbrella, she says "zebra"??; for bones, she says "uggles"??; for polka dots, she says "kooky dots"; and for bruise, she says "screw". I haven't quite figured out how she comes up with all of them, I'm just enjoying this stage.

Have a great weekend!!

Being a Parent Is Hard

We put Ben into a charter school last week. We had heard sooooo much good about it -- the curriculum, the behavior of the kids, etc., etc.
Before he was able to start there, he had to be tested for placement in his math and reading groups. On the day that he was tested, we happened to be there for a fire drill. It was interesting to observe. The kids filed out quietly in their neat uniforms; maintained straight lines; didn't play or push or poke or laugh; answered when their name was called the first time, then walked back into their classrooms in nice straight lines. I had two impressions from watching this: 1) I was impressed that kids could do a fire drill that orderly and seriously, and 2) I wondered if, possibly, this was a very well disguised Nazi concentration camp.
Then we were allowed to go into the classroom and meet the teacher. When we entered, the children were all sitting in their seats, feet under their desks, pencils in hand, mouths closed, eyes on teacher. Again, I thought "Wow!" and "Is this actually normal/good behavior?"
I worried that the change from one school to another might be really hard on Ben. However, on his first day, I stayed for about half of the day. He was doing all right, but there was a lot of changing from one class to another for all of the different subjects. When they taught his spelling/English class, I about died. I always thought that I was relatively smart when it came to English, but this method was truly like a foreign language to me. It's hard to be able to help your child to learn when you don't understand it yourself.
Ben has been miserable. He cries at school. He tells me he hates everything about the new school. He wants his old school back. Today, his tummy started hurting about ten minutes before it was time to go to school. I figured it was a "nervous tummy" as I like to call it. So, I took him to school. Since his teacher told me that he cried a lot yesterday, and since his tummy hurt, I knew he wouldn't go without me. So, I stayed again. I felt very welcome the first day when I stayed. I felt very much like the teachers would like me to leave today. His teacher let me know that Brianna was not allowed to come with me. In his math class, I had been sitting on the floor in the back with Brianna, when Ben came with the Teacher's Aide and a small group to do a lesson. They sat right by me, and Ben sat in my lap. Apparently this is a big "no, no" too.
His main teacher took me aside and did everything but straight-out ask me to leave. I could tell by the way she was speaking to me that she felt that I was probably the real core of Ben's trouble with this adjustment. If I would just make him "buck up" we would be done with the crying and he would be just fine and dandy. I hate being talked down to. I hate it when people who don't know me or my children pass judgement on us and make assumptions.

Right now, I want to put him back in his old school. Maybe he wasn't challenged enough there, but he also wasn't getting an ulcer. He didn't cry. He enjoyed school. Yes, his teacher there asked me at the beginning of the school year if he was taking school seriously. Maybe he wasn't, but is prison camp the answer?

If I take him out, am I teaching him to quit when things are difficult and challenging? If I leave him in, am I teaching him that even when he's completely overwhelmed and miserable, those feelings aren't valid and he's just got to buck up?

The teacher's aide in his main classroom took me aside and urged me to consider home school. She made it clear that she doesn't think that his home room teacher is a good fit for him.

I need help. What should I do?????????

Random Tidbits Overload . . . With Pictures!

Well, apparently Blogger isn't going to let me move my pictures around like I want to. So, I wrote a post and then I stuck in all these pictures. But, since this is a random post, I guess it doesn't matter if it flows or even makes sense, right?

*Here are the two cutest kids in my world!!
* Brianna just spontaneously started hugging Ben at McDonald's, and said, "Mom, take a picture."

*Ben and Brianna worked really hard to arrange this bountiful harvest basket for me.
*James' wonderful Aunt and Uncle invited us (or did we invite ourselves??) to come with them on Labor Day and play at the beach with them and their JetSkis! It was soooo fun!

*Oh, the things you can do with licorice!

* Someone got pretty tired by the end of the afternoon. But, boy oh boy, did she like the JetSki's!! Ben did too! Ben was allowed to "drive" with James on. Ben would go 45 mph! I took Brianna up to about 35 mph, and she let me know that she did NOT like that speed. It took me quite a while to convince her to go back out with me. When she did, I took her at about 20 mph, which she was o.k. with. She called that speed, "A wittow tiny bit fast."

*What a handsome boy! Even with hair that's been done by lake water and wind!

*Every time I sit down to write a new post, my mind goes blank

*Um, ... see?

*Okay, let's give this another go.

*I'm waiting for a delivery from UPS!

*It's some clothes that I ordered online, when I was feeling sorry for myself.

*The kids really liked the beach, but their preference was being out on the JetSki's.

*Here's our kids and some good friend's kids playing in our backyard! Aren't they all so cute?

*I'm a little sad that the mosquitoes are gone for the summer. Only because when Brianna would get a bite, she called it a "Skoodee bite". It was soooo cute! It nearly made the mosquitoes worth it.

*Ben made up a chocolate-coconut no bake cookie recipe yesterday. They turned out really gooey, but very tastey!

*Brianna is borderline-obsessed with the Little Einsteins. She has a toy Rocket and Leo which she takes nearly everywhere with her. She has a hard time saying her "L"s right, and so "Leo" sounds a whole lot like "whale", or I guess it's more like "whay-o", which is pretty much how she says "whale".

*Ben decided it would be really cool to have a Joseph Smith and a Mormon video game. That way, when he wanted to play video games on Sunday, he could. He had many ideas for what each game could include!

*James works too much! The vast majority of the limited time-off that he's taken from work this year has been to do work-related things. So far, he's taken 2 1/2 days off for strictly family time this year. Oh, but don't worry, he has another 3 days scheduled off for family time this year.

***James would like me to note that he does spend time with the family on most weekends and holidays.

*I'm toying with the idea of taking a Home Staging course. I don't think I have the decorating sense, though. I'm better at the de-clutter/de-personalizing side of things.

*I've had no luck finding a pre-school for Brianna.

*Brianna has severe separation anxiety issues again. I don't quite know how to solve this. She's been crying a lot whenever I have to leave her anywhere -- even at home with her daddy and brother.

*We have soccer-related activities (practices/games) 3-4 times per week! Both Ben and Brianna are really good. It's so fun to watch them both!

*I think requiring everyone to have health insurance is a good idea.

*I think government health insurance is a bad idea.

*When my husband spends 12 hours putting some guy's face back together who chose to drive his motorcycle w/o a helmet and without health insurance, I have a hard time hearing about how the uninsured aren't getting the care they need.

*We are considering switching Ben's school. We may put him into a really good charter school here. I was really surprised when I talked with Ben about it, and he was in favor of it. We'll have to see if they're even taking any more students at this time.

*Yesterday, I made the mistake of telling Brianna about Disneyland. She threw a major fit for over an hour because she wanted to go. I told her maybe we'd go to Disneyland after Easter.

*First thing this morning, Brianna asked if we could go to Easter now.

More Than Just The Name of My Blog

Allegorically, viewing the world through a rose-colored lens presents beauty and filters impurities. Now, new research suggests that our moods can in fact change the way in which we view the world.

The University of Toronto study provides the first direct evidence that our mood literally changes the way our visual system filters our perceptual experience suggesting that seeing the world through rose-colored glasses is more biological reality than metaphor.

“Good and bad moods literally change the way our visual cortex operates and how we see,” says Adam Anderson, a U of T professor of psychology.

“Specifically our study shows that when in a positive mood, our visual cortex takes in more information, while negative moods result in tunnel vision.”

View the World Through Rose-Colored Glasses
By Rick Nauert PhD Senior News EditorReviewed by John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on June 5, 2009

A Serious Conversation

Brianna slept in until 7 today!! 7!!! Which means that I also slept in until 7! It felt AWESOME!
Ben is still asleep. I went in to wake him, to get ready for school, but his breathing was so deep and even, and he's been so tired lately, that I just didn't have the heart to do it. I'll take him to school late, if need be.

Last night, when I snuggled Ben at bedtime, he said to me, "I just don't know what to do. I always wanted to be in the Army, but last night I promised Heavenly Father that I would obey ALL of his commandments, and not killing is one of them. So, there goes being a soldier. [pause] And a police officer."
He was genuinely concerned about what options still lay open to him, so we discussed many options. He definitely did NOT want to be a doctor or a dentist. I suggested maybe a movie director, because he's always imagining elaborate movie scenes and describing them to me. "But," he said, "Twentieth Century Fox already HAS a director." :) I tried to explain that every movie and TV show needs a director.
"Maybe my wife will have to be the one to work." he said, "If I have one of those. I don't know if I'll even have a wife."
Then he got excited about the prospect of being a farmer. "I won't even have to go to the store for anything!!" I said, "You mean food-wise?" "No, not for anything, even toys! I can just make the toys from our trees!"
He wanted a cow, and some sheep, and a dog. "But I'm allergic to dogs!" he groaned, completely deflated. "I can't be a farmer without a dog!"
We finally had to end the conversation with the understanding that we still had time to figure out what he would be when he grows up.

So, what do YOU want to be when you grow up? Any suggestions for Ben?

A Practical Mother's Prayer

I'm having a rough day. My heart feels heavy, and I want to cry. Probably hormonal, but still very real feelings.
Yesterday, Ben was telling me about his music teacher who got married over the summer. He had her last year too, so he knew her by her maiden name first. That got him to thinking, and he asked me, "Was it hard for you to go from being a [maiden name] to a [married name]?"

I replied that I had always been very happy to be a [maiden name], but that I was very happy to become a [married name]. I explained that the switch was actually really easy for me -- easier than I had expected. I then reiterated, "I was very happy to become a [married name]."

And he said, "Ya, ... until you had children."

So, obviously, I'm doing a great job as a parent. My kids think I'm not happy to have them. It's no wonder. I feel like all day, everyday, I'm telling them not to do this, or to do that; I'm breaking up fights; I'm enforcing rules; I'm trying to get them to tone down their wild play before someone gets hurt; I'm sending to time-out; I'm trying to get them to pick up their stuff; etc. Most of the time, I feel like I'm being ignored. Now that I've written out how I spend my time all day, I figure it's no wonder they ignore me! I'm sure I'd do the same thing if someone I was around all day was doing/saying all of that.

So, on top of all of that, when I feel that I'm being ignored, my voice does this strange thing where it gets REALLY LOUD. I don't like that. And I'm not proud of it.

So I present you with what I will call

A Practical Mother's Prayer:

Please help me to not yell more than is absolutely necessary.

Please help me to remember how to laugh.

Please help me to not screw my children up too much.

Please help my children to not be opposed to therapy when they are older, and please help them to be able to afford it.

I guess today I am just painfully aware of all of my shortcomings, and feeling like I'll probably never be the mother/wife/homemaker/friend/visiting teacher/daughter/sister/in-law/etc. that I would like to be. And, sometimes, I just feel too tired to do any better.

Today ...

*Today I woke Ben up and got him into the shower early; fed him oatmeal; and got him to the bus stop by 7:20! Then, I started to get suspicious that there were no other kids in sight. I went home and searched on the internet for his bus stop and pick up time. I had tried without success before, but this time I found it. Sure enough, we were at a correct bus stop. It's just that the pick up time is 8:23, not 7:23! They say you lose a lot of what you learned during the school year over summer vacation -- I guess that doesn't just apply to the kids!!

*********

*Today Ben rode the bus to his first day of Second Grade.

*Today he had his hair a little spikey, a black shirt with a bright Star Wars picture all over it, jean shorts, dark blue socks, tennis shoes, his Spiderman backpack, and a dirty jacket (which he chose in favor of his new, clean jacket).

*Today we went to a new bus stop. Ben didn't like that. Last year he was the only kid at his bus stop, which was farther than the one we went to today with lots of kids. I think he likes the alone time before starting his day. Maybe we'll go to the old one tomorrow.

*********

*Today I had the following conversation with Brianna while she was in the bathtub:

Me: You have gymnastics today.

Brianna: Ben's coming?

Me: No. Ben has school.

Brianna: Why we weave Ben at school for gymnastics?

Me: Because he has to go to school and learn.

Brianna: Then he wiw come home to my home and your home?

Me: Yes, he will come home.

Brianna: He just goes to school for a wittow whyow?

Me: Yup. For a little while.

********

*Today my heart hurts just a little.

Chicken Broccoli Alfredo

So, I got a little creative with dinner tonight, and it turned out really well. Here's what I did:

Chicken Broccoli Alfredo

Alfredo Sauce
1/4 cup of butter
2-ish tsp garlic
1 can chicken broth
1-ish cup of cream
1/2-ish cup of half -n-half
3/4 container of Kraft shredded parmesean
1/4 - 1/2 cup Kraft Three Cheese blend
1 big spoonful plop of low-fat mayonnaise
Salt to taste (approx. 1 - 2 tsp.)
pepper to taste
Fresh chopped parsley, several Tbsp.

Melt butter over med-low heat, add garlic and saute. Pour in chicken broth then cream and 1/2-n- 1/2. Add salt & pepper and cheeses and continue to heat over medium to medium-low heat until cheese melts into sauce. Plop in mayonnaise and stir in. Add fresh chopped parsley just before pouring over noodles, chicken sausage, and veggies.

*****
Cook fettuccini noodles to al dente in chicken broth.
*****

Saute chopped chicken sausage (Bistro Sensations, smoked mozzarella with artichoke and garlic) in chicken broth. Add more chicken broth, add chopped broccoli and chopped red bell pepper. Cover and steam for a few minutes.

******
Combine everything and serve with garlic bread and Ceasar salad.

_________
The reviews are as follows:
James: Olive Garden has nothin' on you.
Great Grandpa: This is really excellent.
Ben: I'd have to say the same thing.
Brianna: More bread, please.

____________
I'm glad it worked, because I didn't follow a recipe, and I've never made Alfredo sauce from scratch before. I just looked at a bunch of recipes and got an idea of what is usually in Alfredo sauce, and then I winged it. I wrote it down the best that I can remember.

Where to Begin??

Part One:
Toward the end of June, I had my "YEARLY EXAM". We discussed my infertility, and some of the issues my body is currently giving me. My new gynecologist ordered an ultrasound "just to get a look at the structures inside."

Well, as I expected, all my "structures" were perfectly normal. The ultrasound did show, however, that I had gall stones. "O.k.," I thought, "I'll keep that in mind in case I ever have any symptoms."

Over the 4th of July weekend, we were able to see my awesome youngest brother perform with his band, attend my extended family's yearly picnic and fireworks, and take part in the Annual Grandkid's Birthday Bash! It was so fun to be there for everything after missing out on so much for so many years!

Then, since my parents decided to make an offer on a wonderful home, and put theirs up for sale, I decided to stay the week and help them get ready to list their home. We packed things up, rearranged, and "staged" with gusto! It was fun. I'm glad I could be there to help with the process. I think it was a way for me to gain closure with my childhood home.

Then, that Saturday morning, I packed the kids back in the car, and we headed to Vernal, where we met James to attend his family's annual reunion. It was great to be back together with James, and to see the relatives. But I wasn't feeling very well. So, after the picnic, I headed to Grandpa Boyd's to take a nap. When we went to dinner that night, I still didn't feel well, and only ordered a shake (you know, the perfect thing for someone who isn't feeling well.)

We drove home that night, and the next morning, I stayed home from church because I still wasn't feeling too great.

Part Two:
By Monday morning, I felt like maybe I was on the mend, but I did have this annoying, gnawing pain right below my sternum. I sort of remembered my mom asking me a few times, while I was helping her pack, why I was holding my hand to my stomach. "Oh, I just have a little pain," I would respond.

Well, that annoying, gnawing pain continued until on Wednesday night, I asked James if he would examine me. He did the doctor thing, poking, prodding, and tapping my abdomen, until he announced, "Um, I think it's your gall bladder." He suggested I make an appointment with a doctor, especially as we were to be headed back East in just a week. Then, he said I should probably go straight to a general surgeon to be checked.

The next morning, James called to say that he had spoken with a friend who was a general surgeon. This doctor listened to James' story about me, pulled up my ultrasound pictures, and said he wanted to see me at his office at 9 am.

So, the kids and I went to his office. He told me that I had some pretty major gall stones, but that that didn't necessarily mean that we needed to do anything about it. Then he did the doctor thing with the poking and prodding and tapping. He said, "I can feel your gall bladder. I shouldn't be able to feel it. You need surgery. I can do it today or Monday. But with your trip next Wednesday, we better do it today." It was Thursday. He left the room to see what could be scheduled, and came back in to tell me I would be having surgery in three hours.

Part Three:
Gulp! I left and immediately started making phone calls. My good friend here dropped everything to take my kids for the day. James' parents dropped everything to drive six hours to help us out for the weekend. James' scheduler rearranged all of his afternoon patients so he could be with me. James' partner came over to the surgery center to help James to give me a blessing.

Everything was happening so fast, but it was apparent that there were angels seen and unseen who were watching over me.

As I lay in the hospital bed, with the gown open in the back, the thought occurred to me, and I asked James, "So, uh, if I'm wearing the gown with the opening in the back, but they're going to be cutting into me on the front, ...?" James' response? "Don't worry honey, you'll be totally knocked out." .... Comforting.

And then, I knew I would be wheeled into surgery any moment, and I REALLY started to feel panicky. I mean REALLY panicky. I asked James to just talk to me. I have no idea what he said, but the sound of his voice was comforting. I prayed. And I wondered, "Do I really NEED surgery? I mean it's just an annoying pain; I've been putting up with it for a while, I could continue."

About this time, they started wheeling me away, and whatever it was that they had put into my IV was making me feel v e r y s l e e p y. I don't remember anything else until several hours later when I woke up.

As I lay there, I remember thinking, "the pain is the same, but I don't feel so sick." The fact that the pain felt the same to me with FOUR INCISIONS is probably indicative that I maybe should have had things checked out sooner. But, it was only the same when I was laying still. When I moved, the pain was really bad. I couldn't roll over or sit up on my own.

Finally, with James' help, I sat up, and got dressed (I'll leave out the part about me vomiting and about how bad that hurt. I mean, you really don't want to know about that, right?).
James drove me home, and James, his parents, and my kids helped to take care of me for the next several days. On Sunday, James' parents headed home, and my mom came to help out.
I was making progress everyday, but still hurt, and had low reserves. I was/am so grateful that I had so much help, and that my kids and home were well cared for and loved.

Part Four:
When I went to my follow-up appointment on Tuesday, the doctor told me, "When I saw your gall bladder, I couldn't believe you had walked into my office that morning. It was so sick and swollen and angry that I thought it might start throwing punches when I pulled it out!" He explained to me that there was no way I would have made it until Monday to have had surgery.

Apparently my large gall stones had totally blocked my bile duct, and I had developed hydrops. Which means that instead of being a storage unit for bile, my gall bladder had reabsorbed all of the bile, and had filled with a thick watery substance. He said that my gall bladder had probably not been functioning for months.

He also said that I was fine to travel the next day. James agreed. I had my doubts. But my mom helped me pack (I'm pretty sure she had her doubts too), and early Wednesday morning -- post-op day 6 -- we headed out to Virginia, D.C. and PA.

Part Five:
The kids and I toured Jamestown, ate at expensive (and not that great) pancake houses, and bought souvenirs, while James attended a sinus surgery course. Then, on Saturday, we all headed to D.C. where we visited the Lincoln Memorial, the Washington Monument, and the Smithsonian (specifically the Natural History and Air and Space museums).

On Sunday evening, James flew back home to go back to work (like we need to pay off all those student loans, or something.) And, on Monday, I had the awesome opportunity to visit one of my favorite mission companions who lives near Baltimore. We had a great visit, and I didn't want it to end. It helps, though, when you're looking forward to the next part of your vacation.

That evening, we drove to PA to visit my sister Tiffany and her wonderful family.
Oh, my, I enjoyed my time with them so much! They are fun and VERY funny, and wise. They were o.k. with my slow pace as we ate delicious food, visited, and made wonderful memories.

Then, we came home -- back to real life, inescapable responsibilities, and the impending school year. So, that's what I did on my Summer Vacation! And, other than the unexpected surgery, it was really great. Even with the surgery, I can see so many blessing surrounding it. The fact that I was able to get in and get it done so quickly; the recent ultrasound showing the gall stones; the people who helped out with no prior notice; the fact that I wasn't SO sick despite being so sick; the timing in relation to our trip (one day less to recover, and I would definitely NOT have been going); the blessing I was able to receive; etc., etc.

So, how did you spend your Summer Vacation?

Do YOU Have a Bathroom Fan?

We once had a neighbor who would turn her radio up, and face it toward our paper-thin walls each morning. Since we had paper-thin walls, we were used to hearing noise from our neighbor, and didn't think much of it. Until one day, when James said to me, "I think she turns up her music each time we shower." Sure enough, we started to see a correlation between our showering, and her music. A few days later, we had house guests. After the fourth shower of the day, the music coming through the walls was VERY loud and angry.

James decided to go next door and see if there was a problem that we could work through. Well, James didn't get a word in edge-wise as our neighbor cursed him up and down, and accused him of turning on our bathroom fan to deliberately irritate her. She said that it sounded like a freight train running through her bedroom each time we turned it on. And she ended the wonderful encounter by slamming the door in his face.

At first I was very angry. How dare she? As if we would turn on our bathroom fan to irritate her?! Granted, our bathroom fan was louder than the average bathroom fan, but I slept approximately three steps from the bathroom, and had no trouble sleeping through the fan noise. Since our condos were mirror images of each other, she probably slept approximately four steps from our bathroom. We decided that she must have trained herself to hear the bathroom fan because she had convinced herself that we were making this terrible noise specifically to disturb her.

Later, as I thought more about the whole situation, I realized that I, too, listened for "bathroom fans". Whether because of experiences I had had, or situations I was in, or because I had trained myself to hear them, there were things that I was taking offense at, when no offense was intended. I realized that in doing this, I was cheating myself out of peace and happiness; I was placing unnecessary barriers between myself and the supposed offender and thereby robbing myself of potential meaningful relationships.

I was reminded of this instance recently, when a friend shared with me an experience she had had. My friend moved to a new home several months ago, and soon after received a three page single-spaced type-written letter from her former next-door neighbor. The letter was filled with venom and hatred. The main complaint this former neighbor expressed was against the "selfishness" that my friend had exhibited by not chopping down a tree in their yard that had shaded this neighbor's pool. They had lived next door to each other for many years. It was obvious from the letter that this woman had obsessed over this situation for years, and had seen in it a "bathroom fan". She was certain that my friend was refusing to cut down her tree, simply to make this woman's whole life miserable. She mentioned in the letter that her friends had stopped coming over, a fact that she attributed to the tree not being chopped down.

It is sad to me that this woman wasted YEARS fuming over a situation that my friend had NO idea was bothering her. But, the absolutely saddest part of this is that this woman missed out on the opportunity of a lifetime. She lived next door to two of the most wonderful, unselfish, giving, kind, Christ-like people on the face of the earth, and instead of allowing herself the blessing of their easy friendship, she withdrew into an offended, angry shadow. Yes, Ms. Former Neighbor, I would venture to guess that it was not so much the shadow of the "offending" tree that kept your friends away, as it was the shadow of your offended anger and hatred.

May we all realize the "bathroom fans" that we are allowing to rob us of happiness, peace, and friendship, and may we "turn them off", so to speak, and move forward, embracing all that life has to offer us.

America's Got Talent!

I once received a blessing in which I was told that I had many talents, but not necessarily the kind you would perform on a stage. I have pondered this over the years, and I have come to realize that I do, indeed, possess some very unique talents.

Take for instance, changing the toilet paper roll. I once thought this was a commonly shared ability, but I now know better. I am--how do I say this without tooting my own horn?--the BEST and perhaps the ONLY person in my household with this ability.

Then, there's also my rare, and I do mean RARE, talent for actually closing the back door!

Add to that my rinsing dishes and loading them into the dishwasher abilities; my toilet scrubbing abilities; my laundry folding and putting away abilities, etc. and it soon becomes apparent, that indeed, I DO have talents. And many of them.

So, what are some of your unique talents? Don't be shy, you won't make me feel bad, afterall, I'm a very talented woman in my own right!

Birthdays!!

I failed to post about Ben's 7th birthday back in April! He has grown SO BIG this year! He has matured physically and emotionally. He is so fun to have around. I am grateful to be his mommy.
We went to Chuck-E-Cheese's to celebrate. Ben had a great time, except for when the staff put the spotlight on him for a little bit. I think he would have preferred to quietly, and inconspicuously celebrate!

One of the great things about Ben is that he makes just as big of a deal about other family member's birthdays as he does about his own. He made this "set up", as he calls it, for Brianna just a few days before her birthday. He made that card for her all by himself. The inside reads: 3 is graet! I wish I culd stay 3. You are princes of the haws! Happy Birthday!

I couldn't get Brianna's birthday pictures in order, so we'll go a little backwards. Here we are at Banana's which is a place with bumper boats, miniature golf, go-carts, big inflatable "bump-n-jump" things, etc. Brianna REALLY wanted to go to "Butt-a-nana's", as she calls it, to do bumper boats. She had a blast! We were blessed to be able to have my brother, James, and his wife Dede and their gorgeous baby, Oliver, join us for Brianna's birthday weekend. Brianna had a lot of fun spraying her Uncle James from her bumper boat!

Brianna received a play kitchen. Oh what fun! I asked her what she was cooking that morning, and she replied matter-of-factly, "Oh, chicken."

Brianna sure loves her cousin Oliver! Of course, how could you not love that cute little guy??!

I am eternally grateful to Brianna's birthmom. Brianna has been a joy to us from day one! She is such a bright, fun, happy little soul! She is incredibly smart, and amazingly coordinated! She does everything with great Enthusiasm! We are so happy that she is our little girl!

Happy Birthday to my wonderful kiddos!

Late Night with Leslie

Last night in bed, James and I had a conversation that went something like this:

Me, while reading my scriptures: Can I share an insight I received recently?

James: Uh-hmmmm.

Me: O.k., well, the phrase, "chastisement of our peace" never really made any sense to me, but I always lumped it in with the rest of the verse that I felt I understood at least at some level; "he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed." So, I looked up "chastisement", and an archaic definition is "refinement, purification". Suddenly it became ...

At this point, James interrupts and says: Um, I drifted off there at the end. Something about picking things up off of the ground?

Me: No. ... Not at all.

James: Oh, sorry.

Apparently I am REALLY INTERESTING to talk to late at night. : )

So, for any of you still awake, I'd like to finish my thought.

When I pondered the phrase as "the refinement and purification of our peace was upon him", it became so beautiful to me. He worked at it and sacrificed for us until what He could give to us is PURE peace. So, whatever is standing between us and the peace we seek has already been tended to by He who turned water to wine. We can have pure peace now, through our Savior, Jesus Christ.

Highlights from Our First Swim Lessons of the Season

"I'm NOT getting in!" - Ben

"I DON'T LIKE THIS! I WANT TO GO HOME!" - Brianna

"I DON'T REALLY CARE IF YOU DON'T WANT TO! You're going to do it anyway!" - Me


Perhaps scheduling, and paying in advance for, two two-week long swim lesson sessions was a bit ambitious for this year?

Fun, Fun, Fun, 'til Daddy Takes the T-bird Away!

First loose tooth! (On the bottom, sitting at an angle.) When Ben first noticed his loose tooth, he told everyone! Immediately, Brianna began to tell people that she, too, had a loose tooth . . . in her foot!
Snuggle time.

First black eye. Thanks to a hard bump with a classmate.

At a carnival in town. I thought Brianna would be nervous to ride this little train ride on her own, but she LOVED it. She rode it 3 or 4 times!

Ben's birthday party at Chuck-E-Cheese's.

Future American Idol?? (Singing "I Am a Child of God".)

Teaching Ben to "roll with it". (Also at the carnival.)


Even Simon would be enthralled by her! ("Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star")

When Brianna watched herself in these videos, she said, "So cute!" and "I a good singer!"

Backyard Fun

We got a trampoline!! We toyed with the idea of just putting up the frame; the kids were enjoying it so much!

Yesterday evening we finally got the enclosure put up. Ben and Brianna and a neighbor girl, whom we'll call Miley, were playing a game of Tag on the trampoline. Brianna was IT, but her cute little legs couldn't seem to catch the much bigger children. Suddenly, she stopped, and with a slightly plaintive tone said, "Miley, I just wanna hug you. Just wanna hug you, Miley." Well, Miley couldn't resist that, and came toward Brianna with her arms outstretched. As soon as Miley was in striking distance, Brianna's sweet, innocent expression suddenly became very devious, and she tagged Miley and ran off!

Smart Thinkin'

Ben was with me when I clicked on a news link about the derecho. Wikipedia explains a derecho as: a widespread and long-lived, violent convectively induced straight-line windstorm that is associated with a fast-moving band of severe thunderstorms. These straight-line winds can exceed 100 mph (in some cases, sustained wind) in these clusters and straight-line wind gusts of up to 200 mph are possible in the most extreme cases....

There was footage on the clip, and let me just say that this is one terrifying storm to behold.

Ben asked with some concern, "Is that coming here?"

"No," I reassured him.

"Oh, good. 'Cause if it was, I was going to save my money and buy a car and drive to the airport and trade my car for an airplane and fly outta here!"

Some Tips Regarding the Swine Flu

If you are concerned about the Swine Flu, and you are running short on surgical masks to wear around, may we suggest an alternative:

And, should your area be spared the Swine Flu, you won't need to feel that you wasted your money, because these can also be worn as enviably fashionable head wear. You can't do that with a surgical mask.
Our legal department insists that we mention the minor side effects. Occasionally, wearers have displayed monster-like tendencies. And, even rarer, some wearers have lost muscle tone in one side of their necks. These side effects clear up within a week or so following removal of this product. However, we still feel that the benefits outweigh the risks.If you find yourself infected with the Swine Flu, you should remain home and drink plenty of fluids. However, if you simply MUST venture out, we suggest donning a disguise. Over-sized glasses and moon boots, perhaps.

Healthy habits are the best defense. Eat plenty of fresh fruits and veggies; drink lots of water; get 7-9 hours of sleep each night; and get plenty of exercise and sunshine.

Good luck! And remember, we're all in this together!

(P.S. Are you tired of diaper on the head pictures yet?)

When Kids Choose Their Own Fashions

I laughed the whole way to the bus stop this morning. Brianna was wearing a darling pink nightgown covered in hearts, a pink jacket, moon boots (on the wrong feet), and huge 3-D glasses!!
I laughed again as Ben boarded the bus and I realized he was wearing the same exact shirt that he wore yesterday! That, combined with his new "fauxhawk" hairdo is sure to be quite a hit!

An Update with Photos

Spring has sprung here in the desert. I love it! One of our trees out front was full of white blossoms when Brianna stepped outside the other morning. She said, "Mommy! It's snowing!"

We planted our garden this weekend. It feels so good to be doing something that we've been counseled to do. This is Brianna's "gardeen box". We planted flower seeds a few weeks ago, but Brianna kept "stirring" her gardeen box. Hmmm, I wonder why nothing had grown. So, we planted actual plants, and explained that the stirring needs to be done in the sandbox, and not the garden.

Ben wanted me to take a picture showing how huge this branch was. It's hard to tell in the picture, but it starts at his feet, goes a couple of feet over his head, and then it curves back down to about his armpit. I love the adoring look on Brianna's face, as she tries to do what big brother is doing.

I had the privilege of accompanying Ben and his class on a field trip. It was really fun, and I'm glad to have had the chance to go. Afterward, we walked to a park and ate pizza. Ben was kind enough to pose for me. Ben, and a friend on the bus ride. ... First Grade humor.

While we're on the subject of fingers up noses, I caught Brianna with her finger up her nose the other day. I said, "Brianna, don't pick your nose!" She said, "I not picking my nose! I getting the crumbs out!"

Ben, making his birthday wish! That candle didn't stand a chance!

Oh, the entertaining power of a diaper on the head.

Brianna has fallen in love with books, and usually sleeps with several in her bed with her.

Another Ben and Brianna sleepover. Doesn't Ben look uncomfortable?? And, why is his head UNDER the pillow??! If you look closely, Brianna has a book under her left arm.

Ben with his paper airplane collection. He has become very creative and imaginative with his airplane creations!

It's always fun to see Brianna dance and perform for the camera!