Sunday, January 6, 2008

A Guy Who Keeps Things Real

There used to be a commercial on TV that I HATE. It was for some carpet spot cleaning product, and it featured various family members spilling a variety of stain-producing items on the beautiful light-colored carpet. Without fail, the perfectly composed, mother, with her lovely combed hair, says through her unforced, natural smile, with her white, shiny, straight teeth, in a sing-song voice, "Oh, that's O.K."
I'm not entirely sure why it caused such a total sense of loathing within me. Perhaps, it is because I was raised in a home that did not have a lot of money, and so it was drilled into us to take care of what we had. Perhaps, it is because my own nature is usually to kick into crisis-mode (which usually includes a bit of "OH NO!", "Oh GREAT.", or even at times, "OH CRAP!!) and take care of the mess, and then to follow up with reassurances that I really do love the perpetrator more than the carpet or whatever else was threatened or even ruined (sometimes after having to pause and remember this fact). So, maybe, to me, her reaction just seemed SOOOO staged; so unlikely in the real world; so irritatingly imperturbable.

In the same way, I used to not like Job. Yep, Job. The Old Testament prophet who is the ultimate example for enduring trials well. Ya. Not my proudest moment, but I really had a problem with a guy who could lose his whole family (with the exception of his wife) and pretty much all that he possessed, and say, "Naked came I out of my mother's womb, and naked shall I return thither: the LORD gave, and the LORD hath taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD." (Job 1:21) I guess to me, it seemed dismissive of the significance of what he had lost. It echoed, in my mind, the sing-song, "Oh, that's O.K."
Admittedly, however, that was before I ever took the time to actually READ the book of Job. All I had ever heard from the book of Job was the verse I just quoted above. Now, however, I loooove Job. I am reading the book of Job for the second time now. The first time I read it, I literally could hardly put it down. Admittedly, (as with a lot of the Old Testament) there is stuff in there that I don't get, but I definitely understand most of it, and the over-all feeling is unmistakeable. Job did not in any way, shape or form dismiss the significance of his loss. From the depths of his soul he grieved. His soul was peirced, and he longed for death rather than to endure the pain of his loss.


"Wherefore is light given to him that is in misery, and life unto the bitter in soul;
Which long for death, but it cometh not; and dig for it more than for hid treasures;
Which rejoice exceedingly, and are glad, when they can find the grave?"(Job 3:20 - 22)

On top of this, in the midst of his mourning, his so-called friends called on him; supposedly to offer their support and condolences, but in reality -- not understanding the depth of his loss, his grieving, or of the workings of the Lord -- they add to his pain through their unfounded accusations and judgements.


"BUT Job answered and said, Oh that my grief were throughly weighed, and my calamity laid in the balances together!"(Job 6:1 - 2)



He was in physical, emotional, mental, spiritual, as well as social agony. Even his wife tempts him to "curse God, and die." (Job 2:9) The true beauty of Job, and the reason that he is the paramount mortal example of enduring trials is that he never lost his faith in the Lord. No, Job did not endure his immense trials without complaint. Personally, I love that he complained. Sometimes trials are hard, really hard, and pretending that everything is o.k. when it's not, does little to actually make things o.k.. Job actually did a LOT of complaining, or rather, speaking from the pain of his soul. There was no sing-song, "Oh, that's O.K." attitude. But there was a deep and abiding testimony that he and all he had (and had lost) was in the care of the Lord.

Yep. I love Job. He keeps things real.

Friday, January 4, 2008

The Wisdom of the Five Year Old


It is FREEZING cold outside. My mail is sitting in my mail box, waaaaay out by the street.

Ben often enjoys the adventure of going to get the mail all by himself. So, today I enthusiastically asked, "Hey, Ben, wanna go get the mail?"


He very matter-of-factly answered, "Mom, you are not given sons to do everything for you. You are given sons so that they can grow up to be adults and can get bodies. (pause) Daughters too. You were a daughter once, so you should know."


My mail is still sitting in my mail box. Waaaay out by the street. In the FREEZING cold.

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Gone Too Soon

My heart aches tonight for our dear friends and neighbors from our last home. They lived right across the sidewalk from us in our townhome condominium complex. They are wonderful, genuine people. There is no pretense with them. They were welcome in our home -- no matter what state it was in -- and the feeling was mutual. We loved hanging out with them.
They moved away one year before we did, and we missed them terribly. They had one child, a beautiful daughter, when they moved. They have since added three boys and a baby girl, with another child on the way. They love and adore their children, and are amazing parents.
We received an e-mail from them today telling us that their eight-month old daughter passed away unexpectedly yesterday. I cannot even imagine. I am grateful that they have the gospel, and that they are sealed to their little one. I am sure that is comforting, but I'm sure there is still an awful ache, or perhaps, a fearful numbness.
They live far from us, and they were far from home, visiting family when it happened. I do not have a phone number or an address for where they are currently staying, so I cannot even send anything. I want to do something to help, but it seems all I can do is to pray for them. Not that I'm underestimating the power or importance of prayer, it's just that it doesn't seem like enough.
And so I ask you, please hold your loved ones a little closer and a little longer tonight, in memory of baby Esther.

There are pictures of their beautiful children at this site: www.hibbertfamilypics.blogspot.com

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

2008 Small and Simple Resolutions


When I was twelve years old, I made a commitment to read the scriptures everyday-- even if it was only one verse. I did very well with this, though many times, for many years, it was just a verse a day. Fortunately, this had the effect of forming a habit of daily scripture reading, and I even reached the point of not being able to sleep at night until I had read the scriptures. More importantly, it created within me a love for the scriptures, and I have truly rarely missed a day of contact with the scriptures since I was twelve.


This year, as I pondered setting New Year's Resolutions (and remembering all of my failed resolutions) I remembered this experience, and hoped that this sort of approach might carry over into other areas of my life. So, here are my resolutions:



This year I will exercise five minutes a day! (Who doesn't have 5 minutes a day to exercise -- just like who can't read one verse per day? Hopefully it will grow into a love for exercise)




This year I will eat, and feed my family, one vegetable and one fruit per day! (Hopefully this will grow into the five a day, but you've gotta start somewhere right?)




This year I will make my bed each day!




This year I will keep my kitchen sink clean each day!



I am well aware that these are integral parts of many women's lives and personalities, but I have much room to improve. So, here's to the hope that out of small and simple things, great things will come to pass!!

Monday, December 24, 2007

Merry Christmas, from Our Home To Yours!!

We wish you a Merry Christmas -- in our NEW Christmas jammies!!

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

"For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn!"

Sometimes the trials, heartaches and sadnesses of this life seem magnified somehow against the backdrop of the glittering Christmas lights and jovial sounds. But tonight, as I was pondering the trials and difficulties that so many people I know and love are facing, I remembered that Christmas should infuse a "thrill of hope" to all, but especially to those who are in need of succor. Jesus Christ came to earth to provide deliverance to all who would accept. He delivers us from the "monsters" of sin and death, but also from heartache, and heart-break, from pain and sorrow caused by other's choices, from depression, from addiction, from disease, from loneliness. He came because of love, and His love is powerful enough to heal and to free, to correct and to comfort. The love of our Father in Heaven to send His Only Begotten Son, and the love of our Savior to come for each of us truly should bring us a "thrill of hope" for which this "weary world" can rejoice. Merry Christmas! May the true Spirit of the season lighten your loads, and bring hope to your hearts!

Here is my humble addition to the beloved classic: (I don't expect this to catch on.)

Silent Night, Holy Night.
Here I kneel, Seeking Light.

God, heal my heart,
Heal my soul, hear my plea.
Help me remember
Thy Son came for me.

Help me to trust and believe
Through Him I will be made free.


Silent Night, Holy Night.
Shadows flee; Breaking light.

He has all power,
all glory, all grace.
He heals my soul,
wipes the tears from my face.

Savior, my Prince of Peace,
Jesus, I trust and believe.

Saturday, December 8, 2007

My Continuing Education

Ben + Thanksgiving time + Kindergarten =


I've been trying to tell you just how independent this little girl is. Today, she decided that she would get herself dressed. She tolerated, though didn't like, my help with her top; but she was going to get her pants on by herself!!!



Empty lego box + Brianna =


Legos + Pooh bear + Tigger + a little Ben magic =

ACE bandage + Ben + Brianna =


2 minutes alone + toddler + cereal box left on table =


2 minutes alone + powdered sugar from German Pancakes + 5 year old =
Indian Headress + Star Wars Storm Trooper Blaster + Thanksgiving time + Ben's imagination =
Big brother + empty Lego box + Little sister =


Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Malt-O-Princess and Director Ben

Today we had our first accumulating snowfall of the season! It was beautiful to look out and see the world transformed into a winter wonderland. The kids, of course, wanted to go out into it. Ben got himself all bundled up, while I was bundling Brianna. I don't have a snowsuit for Brianna, yet. So, I put layer after layer on our little Princess. By the time I decided that she would probably be warm enough, she resembled the Malt-O-Meal kid. She was soooo cute in her little snow boots and winter gear.

Ben had already headed outside, and Brianna was going crazy to join him. So, when I only had my boots left to pull on, I let her out the door, and asked Ben to keep an eye on her for just a minute.

Before I had my second boot pulled all the way on, I could hear her crying. I quickly pulled it the rest of the way on, and headed out the door. Ben was explaining, "I tried to keep her from falling in the snow, but she fell anyway." Sure enough. Poor little Princess! She must have face-planted, because half of her face was covered in snow! I picked her up and dusted off the snow. She was VERY upset, but stopped crying long enough to turn back and say, "Bye, bye" to the world of snow. I do believe that she was communicating that, "Hey, I've tried playing in that cold, white stuff, and it didn't work out. . . . So, what's next on the agenda??"

******************

Playing with Ben is like being on stage with no script, and having a Director tell you every action to make, thought to think, and word to speak. Line by line, moment by moment. No improvisation. Don't try to think or imagine, it's all provided for you, at no extra charge!! I love my son very much, but I don't enjoy this type of play. However, no matter how many times I try to explain that I would like to be able to think of my own things to say and do, I never really make any progress. I think I need a better agent! If I HAVE to follow a script, you'd think that at least I could get it in advance!!!

For example, yesterday's play began like this:

Ben: You are watching a sport, and your favorite player is Blood Swiper.
Me: Blood Swiper??!
Ben: Yes. Now, Blood Swiper is your favorite, and you love all of his moves, so you're always cheering for him.
Me: (tentatively) Go Blood Swiper??!
Ben: Then, you get the chance to meet your favorite player.
Me: Um, Blood Swiper, where did you get your name?
Ben: Mom, in the game you really didn't ask that, OK? It's just his name, OK?

Now, you see my dilemma? Blood Swiper??? Hello? Where did that come from? OK, no more horror movies for Ben! And YOU try cheering for someone named Blood Swiper! I couldn't even shorten it: "Go B.S!" Ya, that would for sure come back to haunt me.

Monday, December 3, 2007

An Original Story by Ben

The Turkey

Once there was a turkey. He ran away from home because he wanted to explore. The next morning, he found a cave. And he decided to explore it. He found two narrow paths. He chose one narrow path that was scary and it had bats in it. And then he took another path and found home.

The End.


My scanner is not cooperating, or else you could see the awesome illustrations

Sunday, December 2, 2007

The Journey of Life Lesson

This is the lesson I gave in Relief Society today. This blog is also my journal, and so, I'd like to post this. Please feel free to share any thoughts or feelings you may have. I wish I could have recorded all of the wonderful things that the sisters shared during the lesson. (Some of this is rough, as it is my notes for my lesson.)

Give background for Ether chapter 6.

Ether 6:4 And it came to pass that when they had prepared all manner of food, that thereby they might subsist upon the water, and also food for their flocks and herds, and whatsoever beast or animal or fowl that they should carry with them—and it came to pass that when they had done all these things they got aboard of their vessels or barges, and set forth into the sea, commending themselves unto the Lord their God.

Note three actions here: 1) Prepare, 2) Commit, 3) Commend: to entrust for care or preservation.

5 And it came to pass that the Lord God caused that there should be a furious wind blow upon the face of the waters, towards the promised land; and thus they were tossed upon the waves of the sea before the wind.
6 And it came to pass that they were many times buried in the depths of the sea, because of the mountain waves which broke upon them, and also the great and terrible tempests which were caused by the fierceness of the wind.

I don’t know about you, but I would be wondering what I had done to merit such hardship. “furious wind”, “tossed upon the waves . . . before the wind”, “buried … [by] the mountain waves … which were caused by the fierceness of the wind.” This doesn’t sound fun. And it doesn’t sound fair! Hadn’t they done as they were instructed? Hadn’t they prepared well?

There is a key to our understanding in verse 5: “the Lord God caused that there should be a furious wind blow … towards the promised land”. The Lord uses the wind to get the people where they need to be in His time.

Nephi teaches us to liken the scriptures to ourselves. So, what could the “wind” represent in our lives?

Trials. Challenges. Adversity.

“Just when all seems to be going right, challenges often come in multiple doses applied simultaneously. When those trials are not consequences of your disobedience, they are evidence that the Lord feels you are prepared to grow more (see Prov. 3:11–12). He therefore gives you experiences that stimulate growth, understanding, and compassion which polish you for your everlasting benefit. To get you from where you are to where He wants you to be requires a lot of stretching, and that generally entails discomfort and pain.” Richard G. Scott, “Trust in the Lord,” Ensign, Nov. 1995


What could the “sea” or “waters” represent?

Earth life? Earthly responsibilities/concerns?

James said: The waters stand between us and our Promised Land. We must traverse them. They hold and are a source of life, but we don’t want to be swallowed up in them. There are dangers that threaten to overwhelm; must be managed with care and prayer.

Elder Dallin H. Oaks taught, “Most of us have more things expected of us than we can possibly do. As breadwinners, as parents, as Church workers and members, we face many choices on what we will do with our time and other resources.
We should begin by recognizing the reality that just because something is good is not a sufficient reason for doing it. The number of good things we can do far exceeds the time available to accomplish them. Some things are better than good, and these are the things that should command priority attention in our lives.
Jesus taught this principle in the home of Martha. While she was "cumbered about much serving" (
Luke 10:40), her sister, Mary, "sat at Jesus' feet, and heard his word" (v. 39). When Martha complained that her sister had left her to serve alone, Jesus commended Martha for what she was doing (v. 41) but taught her that "one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her" (v. 42). It was praiseworthy for Martha to be "careful and troubled about many things" (v. 41), but learning the gospel from the Master Teacher was more "needful.”

How do we choose where to spend our limited time, energy, and focus?

Elder Donald L. Hallstrom has taught, “Leading a balanced life can be difficult for any of us. There is not an exact pattern that works for everyone, and even our own blueprint may change during different phases of life. However, seeking balance—giving adequate time and effort to each of those things that really matter—is vital to success in our mortal probation. There are certain fundamental responsibilities we cannot neglect without serious consequence.”

****
President Gordon B. Hinckley has taught:
“I think … all of us in this Church … have a fourfold responsibility. One, [members and leaders] have a responsibility to their families, to see that their families have a measure of their time. … None of us can evade that. … That is basic and fundamental.
“If we are employed, we have a responsibility to our employer. We are not at liberty to short-change him. …
“We have a responsibility to the Lord, of course, to do that which is expected of us as a servant in His house.
“And … we have a responsibility to ourselves to take some time to do a little meditating, to do a little exercise. …"

****
In an Ensign article entitled, “The Stresses of Life,” Lili De Hoyos Anderson wrote “Mosiah 4:27 tells us: “See that all these things are done in wisdom and order; for it is not requisite that a man should run faster than he has strength.” With regard to worldly stress, this means: Simplify!
My mother-in-law once told me that when she feels overwhelmed, she gauges the things that are stressing her by the statement: “A man running for his life would never notice something like this.”
At times we may all need to apply this kind of philosophy liberally to our own temporal concerns. No one knows better than you the things that cause you worldly stress. Make a list. Then get out the red pencil and (this is the tricky part) be ruthless! Cross out the items that don’t pass the running-for-your-life test.
Of course, most of those items are on your list in the first place because you, or someone important to you, cares about them. But if we cannot learn to let go of worldly things, the eternal results may be disastrous.” (Lili De Hoyos Anderson “The Stresses of Life,” Ensign, Feb 1994, 47)


7 And it came to pass that when they were buried in the deep there was no water that could hurt them, their vessels being tight like unto a dish, and also they were tight like unto the ark of Noah; therefore when they were encompassed about by many waters they did cry unto the Lord, and he did bring them forth again upon the top of the waters.

Have any of you ever felt “encompassed about by many waters?” Or “buried in the deep?”

All the water in the world,
However hard it tried,
Could never sink the smallest ship
Unless it [gets] inside.

And all the evil in the world,
The blackest kind of sin,
Can never hurt you the least bit
Unless you let it in.

Richard G. Scott has taught, “Don’t let the workings of adversity totally absorb your life. Try to understand what you can. Act where you are able; then let the matter rest with the Lord for a period while you give to others in worthy ways before you take on appropriate concern again.”

Jeffrey R. Holland has taught, “Christ knows better than all others that the trials of life can be very deep and we are not shallow people if we struggle with them. But even as the Lord avoids sugary rhetoric, He rebukes faithlessness and He deplores pessimism. He expects us to believe!”

When we feel overwhelmed or discouraged, we can pray, and the Lord will bring us UP.

8 And it came to pass that the wind did never cease to blow towards the promised land while they were upon the waters; and thus they were driven forth before the wind.

It never ends, but if we’re right with the Lord, at least the wind is taking us in the right direction!

9 And they did sing praises unto the Lord; yea, the brother of Jared did sing praises unto the Lord, and he did thank and praise the Lord all the day long; and when the night came, they did not cease to praise the Lord.

What are some ways that you have found helpful for maintaining, or re-gaining, a spirit of gratitude during your journey?

10 And thus they were driven forth; and no monster of the sea could break them, neither whale that could mar them; and they did have light continually, whether it was above the water or under the water.

There are many things that threaten us and our families in this world, but if we do what we can, in wisdom, to prepare, commit, and commend, we have the promise of His light, whether we are above the water or under the water.

As I have pondered what the barges could represent -- what is it that carries us safely across our Earthly responsibilities and keeps us safe from adversity and trials -- I finally realized that the barges represent our covenants. For me, this added a whole other dimension to the analogy.


Richard G. Scott: True enduring happiness with the accompanying strength, courage, and capacity to overcome the most challenging difficulties comes from a life centered in Jesus Christ. Obedience to His teachings provides a sure foundation upon which to build. That takes effort. There is no guarantee of overnight results, but there is absolute assurance that, in the Lord’s time, solutions will come, peace will prevail, and emptiness will be filled.


11 And thus they were driven forth, three hundred and forty and four days upon the water.

Our days are known, and will not be numbered less. D&C 122:9

12 And they did land upon the shore of the promised land. And when they had set their feet upon the shores of the promised land they bowed themselves down upon the face of the land, and did humble themselves before the Lord, and did shed tears of joy before the Lord, because of the multitude of his tender mercies over them.

As long as we STAY IN THE BOAT, we, too, will set our feet upon the shores of our Promised Land, and shed tears of joy before the Lord because of the multitude of His tender mercies over Us.

What is our Promised Land? Eternal life.