If you break up your writing, does that make it poetry?

A black cat

ran across the road

in front of me

today.

I just laughed

because

he had missed his cue.

You see, it was YESTERDAY that

I backed my car

into another car

in my driveway;

destroying my back bumper

and their front bumper.

And it was earlier this morning when

I went to my scheduled pre-op appointment

for my LASIK procedure

on Monday,

that they informed me that my surgery is on

TUESDAY!

"No," I said, "I'm scheduled for MONDAY."

"No," she said, "We never do that surgery

on Mondays!

"I don't know where

You would have gotten that idea." she said.

"You wrote it on my paperwork." I said.

And I showed her the paperwork.

I still don't know

if I will or will not

be having surgery

on Monday.

When I got home

a person near and dear to my heart called

in tears.

Her burdens are heavy.

Her hope is slim.

I reminded her to breathe,

And I counted my blessings;

For they are many.

So, little black cat,

wherever you are,

thanks for the laugh.

Six Random Thoughts in Ten Minutes

1. Why is it so easy to break a good habit, and so hard to break a bad habit?

2. Caspian is gone. We placed him with a family with grown children. :(

3. James is off hunting and fishing. I miss him.

4. I am a good cookie maker.

5. Brianna is going to visit Grandma next week. I am really going to miss her.

6. Funny story: This morning there was some debate about whether Brianna needed to shower. She wanted to, but had just showered last night. I tried to convince her to just get dressed. She headed upstairs, and soon called down to me. I thought she said, "I picked out my clothes and got all dressed." So I said, "Good job! Come here and let me see you!" But, what she really said was, "I picked out my clothes and got UNdressed." So, in bursts my naked little exhibitionist. I exclaimed, "Brianna, get upstairs right now!" and I headed for her, knowing that she had won and I would be throwing her into the shower. She giggled, and said, "Oh no! I better hurry or you'll spank my lovely little bottom!"

Actually ...

Me: Brianna, you're going to be an awesome mommy when you grow up.

Brianna: No, I'm not going to be a mommy, I'm going to be a grandma.

Me: (Grin)

Brianna: Actually, I am going to be a mom. ... Actually's are berry important to change fings you want to change.

Me: Yes, actually's are very important. :)

Want My Dog? .... No, I'm Serious.

We have here an adorable male mini-schnauzer. House-trained, crate-trained, loves to play fetch, is mellow, and sweet as can be with James and I. He knows "sit" "down" "out" "outside" and is learning "stay". Unfortunately, kids make him nervous and he nips frequently at them.

We've been hoping, since Christmas, that he would "outgrow" this behavior, but with Brianna squeezing him to death when she's loving him, and whacking him when she's not, he hasn't seemed to improve.

He has broken the skin more than once with his nipping, and we feel that he's just too unpredictable to have around kids.

So, if you're an adult, living with other adults or alone, looking for a hypo-allergenic companion, Caspian may be the dog for you -- especially if you don't like kids. :)

Random Post, Limerick-style

We just celebrated 13 years!
'Cause we're Mormon, we didn't drink beers.
It was nice just to be
With my Honey and Me,
As we clinked our sodas for "Cheers!"

*****

Ben is loving his old public school.
Old and new friends and a teacher who's cool.
His biggest complaint?
His friends think he's a Saint!
They all believe his word to be rule.

*****

Brianna's just biding her time
'Til she starts Preschool, with Nursery Rhymes
Her best buddy will be
In her class, luckily,
For, to separate them would be a crime!

In Which Hormones are like Smoking Pot

Each month, for about a week at a time, I experience amotivational syndrome which occurs concurrent with PMS.
Well, to be perfectly honest, I looked up "amotivational syndrome" to make sure I was using the term correctly. You see, I use it to mean: lacking motivation of any kind (i.e., I should probably shower at some point today, ... meh; I should probably feed my children, ... meh; etc.). I have been using this term freely for a good decade or so, but somehow, wanting to put it into writing, I felt I better know what I'm talking about.
This is what I found on Wikipedia:

"Amotivational syndrome is a psychological condition associated with diminished inspiration to participate in social situations and activities, with lapses in apathy caused by an external event, situation, substance (or lack of), relationship, or other cause."

Oh good! I was using the term correctly. But, then it goes on to say,

"empirical studies suggest that there is no such thing as "amotivational syndrome", per se, but that chronic cannibas intoxication can lead to apathy and amotivation."

No such thing??! But, ...but, ...but there HAS to be, because I experience it. My dishes and laundry pile up, we live in jammies, we eat frozen meals or whatever is readily edible from the pantry. And then, one morning, after about a week, I wake up and again feel like cleaning and doing laundry and reclaiming my home from the clutter-monsters (they're like dust-bunnies, only scarier).

Did you know what "cannibas" is? I had to look it up. It's marijuana, pot, Mary Jane, whatever you want to call it. So, I guess that somehow the same hormones that cause PMS are equivalent to smoking pot for a week at a time, once a month.

At least for me.

The Parable of the Guy on the Side of the Road (re-run)

As I said my prayers this morning, I was feeling down, and the words that I used to describe how I was feeling were “robbed” and “beaten”. (And they were, perhaps, a bit dramatic.) I didn’t mean them at all in a physical way, and it wasn’t until after I had said them that the connection to the parable of the Good Samaritan came into my mind. In the parable of the Good Samaritan, the man on the side of the road had been robbed and beaten, physically. I realized that we usually just try to relate to the Good Samaritan in the story. Suddenly I felt that we should remember that we are all, at one time or another, the guy on the side of the road.

This life can be very hard. There are many ways that we can be, or at least feel “robbed”: robbed of time with loved ones; robbed of experiences we longed for; robbed of opportunities; and “beaten”: beaten by circumstances beyond our control; beaten by the cares and worries of life; etc.

With this in mind, we can each be the Good Samaritan as well. In the parable, the Good Samaritan could see the wounds, and the physical needs of the man were evident. The parable states that the Good Samaritan had compassion on this man and went to him and bound up his wounds, and gave him relief and placed him on his own beast, and brought him to an inn, and took care of him.

Our dear Sister Hinckley has said, “Be kind. Everyone you meet is fighting a battle." Remembering that, and realizing that the wounds of those around us are often invisible to the naked eye, our “binding up of wounds” and our “giving of relief” must truly be guided by the compassion of our hearts and by the Spirit. Compassion is an attribute of Christ. The more we practice this attribute, the more we will become like Christ. Perhaps that is why there is so much opportunity for practicing this in the world. Perhaps there are so many chances to be both the guy on the side of the road, and the Good Samaritan, because there are so many lessons to be learned from both sides of the street—so to speak.

P.S. I'm really o.k., the Lord, Himself, is very good at binding up wounds when we allow Him to see them. I'm feeling much better. Plus I felt like I got a nice insight.

If you haven't ...

Written the date today, you should. It's fun.

The Quiet Heart (re-run)

There is a line in a hymn that I love that says, "In the quiet heart is hidden sorrows that the eye can't see." I love that. It is so true. We all have sorrows past or present. We all have trials and hardships, challenges and difficulties. Some are more obvious to outsiders, and some are perfectly hidden.

There are parts to each of us that we would prefer others not know about. Usually things that we dislike about ourselves or refuse to accept. Some are things we can (or think we should be able to) control, and others are beyond our control.

I believe there is an innate fear surrounding these hidden sorrows. A fear of rejection should anyone discover. We each long for acceptance and true love, but fear holds us back from sharing with one another the things that we believe would bring about the feared rejection. Then, ironically, even when we find "acceptance" and "love" we don't fully trust it, believing that "if they only knew the real me," this love and acceptance would be lost.

In reality, the more we share with one another, the more mutual understanding, the more connected, the more actual love and acceptance we find. I'm not advocating T-shirts advertising our greatest weaknesses, or any of our hidden sorrows. I'm only observing that, in the right time and place, sharing with one another those sorrows that we usually keep hidden can actually be a validating, freeing, and therapeutic exercise. I think exercise is a good word for that, because it's not easy or comfortable.

In the MTC, they taught us not to share 'past transgressions', which I lovingly dubbed, "trans-pastgressions". I do believe there is wisdom in this for the most part -- especially as missionaries who carry that mantle and are teaching those with the first tender shoots of budding faith. There are times, however, when the lessons learned from our trans-pastgressions can and, perhaps should, be appropriately shared; times when that sharing could actually help lift another. Definitely discretion should always be used in this.

I used to put people up on pedestals and think they were completely infallible. Then, when I would find out, to my horror, that they were just regular people, I would be crushed. Boy have I come a long way! Much of my journey came through the trials of my life. I am grateful for the things that I have learned along the way. They have blessed me with more compassion and empathy, and with the sure unwavering knowledge that we truly each have our own sorrows hidden in our quiet hearts. No more pedestals here, just a lot of slack! Slack that I hope is afforded me in return.

Something You Never, NEVER Want to Hear

"Mom! Mom!! Mom!! The BEST news EVER!! They had babies!! They're so cute!!"


Yes, what are the chances that the two snakes he would have for only TWO WEEKS would have FOUR BABIES!!?

I'm outta here .....